154. Maybe the Driver Yelled “Fore!”

Jerry parked alongside the winding road next to his favorite golf course. He got out of his brand new Honda and took his clubs out of the trunk. He closed the trunk and stood there, admiring his new car. He carried his clubs to the clubhouse. He rented a pull cart and paid his greens fees. He walked out to the first tee. Nobody was on the fairway in front of him. He hit his drive and started walking up the fairway.

The first fairway was next to the road. He could see his car as he walked uphill. Suddenly he heard tires screeching. He heard somebody yell something. He looked further up the road. A car was speeding downhill. It was going way too fast. Jerry watched in horror. Please don’t hit my new car, he prayed. The driver of the speeding car lost control. The car crashed into Jerry’s car. A fence separated the road from the golf course. Jerry ran over to the fence. He saw the driver get out of his car. He was laughing!

The driver started running down the road. Jerry climbed over the fence and ran after him. Another golfer called 911. Jerry couldn’t keep up with the driver. He lost sight of him. Jerry trudged back uphill to his car. It was totaled. He looked in the other car. On the passenger floor was a bottle of whisky. He saw a marijuana cigarette in the open ashtray. Several police cars drove up to the golf course. A policeman interviewed Jerry. Jerry saw a police helicopter searching for the driver. Jerry called his wife. She arrived in her car. He put his clubs and a few things from the Honda into her car. Tow trucks towed the two wrecked cars away. Jerry and his wife went home.

The police found the driver a day later. They charged him with various offenses. Later, the driver went to court. He told the judge he had had a flat tire. The judge made him pay a small fine. Jerry couldn’t believe it when he heard the news from a police officer. Jerry said, “That guy didn’t have a flat tire. He was speeding! He was drunk on whisky and high on pot. He totaled two cars. If I had been in my car, I’d be dead. He left the scene of the crash. He ran from the police. He had no insurance. He lied to the judge. And nothing happens to him?!” The officer said, “Yeah, some people have all the luck. On the other hand, if you had been in your car and he had killed you, he probably would be in jail right now. So, which do you prefer?”

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