15. Theft Occurs Everywhere An elderly woman told the police that, as she entered a restroom, she was jostled by a woman behind her. A few minutes later, as she was about to pay for a moustache remover at a nearby store, she discovered that her wallet was missing from her purse. Apparently the woman…

14. Water Under the Sink Ed came home from his errands and put the groceries into the cupboard and the refrigerator. He grabbed a flathead screwdriver and a pair of pliers from his toolbox. In the kitchen, he got down on his hands and knees and turned on the flashlight. After a couple of minutes…

13. Water Under the Sink The 36-year-old bachelor ate his usual lunch at home. He had an apple, a ham sandwich with a sliced dill pickle, a bowl of chicken noodle soup with a couple of soda crackers, and a small candy bar, all washed down with an eight-ounce glass of milk. After he finished…

12. Book Him A man accused of failing to return more than 700 children’s books to five different libraries in the county was released from jail yesterday after a book publisher agreed to post his bond of $1,000. The publisher said, “There’s a story here. This is a man who loves books. He just can’t…

11. A Missing Cat The owner of a missing cat is asking for help. “My baby has been missing for over a month now, and I want him back so badly,” said Mrs. Brown, a 56-year-old woman. Mrs. Brown lives by herself in a trailer park near Clovis. She said that Clyde, her 7-year-old cat,…

10. Goats Being Hired Goats are being hired to do the work of men in a neighborhood just outside of San Diego. The fires that occurred in Hillborough four years ago destroyed thirty homes, most of which have been rebuilt. While contractors were rebuilding the homes, nature was regrowing the grasses, bushes, and shrubs. The…

9. Wanted To Know How His Pig’s Doing Two mayors made a bet on the outcome of the Vegetable Bowl, the annual football game between their high school teams. If Arvada’s team lost, the mayor of Arvada would send the mayor of Boulder ten pounds of sliced potatoes, ready for frying. If Boulder’s team lost,…

8. Food Fight Erupted in Prison Inmates released two correctional officers they had held for a week in the tower at the state prison complex. The inmates captured the officers a week ago after the two officers tried to quell a food fight in the main dining room. The food fight erupted when the prisoners…

7. Better To Be Unlucky Sam, an unemployed piano tuner, said it was only the second thing he had ever won in his life. The first thing was an Afghan blanket at a church raffle when he was 25 years old. But this was much bigger: it was $120,000! He had won the Big Cube,…

6. Freeway Chase Ends at Newsstand A 24-year-old Los Angeles man was taken to a hospital and then to county jail after leading police on a one-hour freeway chase in a stolen SUV. The chase ended in downtown Los Angeles in front of the Spring Hotel. Most of the chase was uneventful, except for an…